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*my news*

life update:
life is good.

sheryl crow, "greatest hits"

jane austen, pride and predjudice




caedmon's call [.net]
jason harrod
john mayer
sandra mccracken
derek webb [.net]


boston red sox
grassroots music
homestar runner
new england patriots
t-rev's guitar tabs

*lily archives*

by derek webb

beloved these are dangerous times
because you are weightless like a leaf from the vine
and the wind has blown you all over town
because there is nothing holding you to the ground

so now you would rather be
a slave again than free from the law

beloved listen to me
don't believe all that you see
and don't you ever let anyone tell you
that there's anything that you need
but me

beloved these are perilous days
when your culture is so set in it's ways
that you will listen to salesmen and thieves
preaching other than the truth you've received

because they are telling lies
for they cannot circumcise your hearts

beloved there is nothing more
no more blessings and no more rewards
than the treasure of my body and blood
given freely to all daughters and sons


in my place, in my place, were lines that i couldn't change, i was lost, oh yeah.
- coldplay

come up to meet you, tell you i'm sorry, you don't know how lovely you are. i had to find you, tell you i need you, tell you i set you apart...
- coldplay

i wonder sometimes about the outcome of a still verdictless life...am i living it right?
- john mayer

would you want me when i'm not myself? wait it out while i am someone else? and i, in time, will come around. i always do, for you...
- john mayer

a desert's just a sea without a shore, and a lonely man at worst is still a man...
- andrew peterson

sleep, sleep tonight, and may your dreams be realized...
- u2

but if i must go, things i trust will be better off without me, but i don't want to know, life is better off a mystery...
- derek webb

i dreamt i saw your face tonight, it's funny the wars we choose to fight, like knowing something is not right, or knowing when it is...
- sandra mccracken

my heart is where it's always been, my head is somewhere in-between...
- u2

the truth is that we are all sinners. i always include myself in the 'we'. i'm not telling everybody that i have the answers. i'm trying to get across the difficulty that i have being what i am.
- paul "bono" hewson

* Sunday, February 15, 2004 *

new blog location.
for all who are interested, lily of the field is no more.

laden with thoughts.

thanks to all who came here to read and support me. :) i'd love to see you over at my new place.

* Tuesday, January 13, 2004 *

feeling prosey.
hmm... hello blog. now that no one is reading you anymore i feel compelled to write again.


let's see what develops.

* Tuesday, August 26, 2003 *

the weight of glory...
lately i feel as if i've been wrapped in a soft warm blanket and given a mug of tea to drink while i sit and watch my days go by one at a time. each day comes slowly and goes by quickly. i get many things accomplished yet have time for introspection on a daily basis. i spend a lot of time in pensive silences... trying to grasp the little snatches of song that flit by me. my hope and excitement for heaven are growing. my best friend and husband encourages me every day and surprises me in ways i had not anticipated, increasing my love for him and for God. these are blessings i do not deserve.

the high countries
by sandra mccracken

a bus station, in the steam from the rain
in this line of pale strangers, should i go or stay?

the whole field of vision, fades beneath me now
and the houses spread for a million miles in this gray town

and the weight of glory, if you held it in your hand
it would pass right through you, so now’s your chance

would you fall to pieces
would you fall to pieces
would you fall to pieces
in the high countries?

we are just pilgrims of the great divorce
i am witness to the light and I am captive
to my own remorse

and the weight of glory, if you held it in your hand
It would pass right through you, so now’s your chance

would you fall to pieces
would you fall to pieces
would you fall to pieces
in the high countries?

you drink the cup to the bottom, but it burns in your hands
the cup was poured out on the Maker instead

out on the green plains, i am but a ghost
bound up with all that i call “mine,” still the light grows

would you fall to pieces
would you fall to pieces
would you fall to pieces
in the high countries?

* Wednesday, August 06, 2003 *

i want to share some of my favorite paintings with you. they are all paintings of the rouen cathedral by claude monet.

"you can turn off the sun, but i'm still gonna shine..." -jason mraz

* Monday, August 04, 2003 *

have you ever listened to a band called waterdeep? i have a worship album that they put out a few years back that i love. i was listening to it last night for the first time in a long time while i was cleaning up the kitchen after dinner... and before i knew it i was just standing in the middle of the kitchen with tears streaming down my face. i felt that God was there and He loved me even though i have been paying attention to myself these days and not as much to Him. it was heart breaking and wonderful all at the same time.

so... i feel refreshed this morning. i haven't done any bible reading in a few months. i think i will do some when i get home from work today. it's funny to me (not funny haha) that so much time has passed and yet i'm still dealing with the same struggles of complacency and doubt and all those spiritual battles that i was dealing with in high school. sometimes i get scared that nothing has changed in me, and in my relationship with Christ. i want to believe i have changed though... and in a way these struggles are so good because they mean i am still alive and kicking and trying to survive. perserverance builds character! yay!

"you poured out all your blood, you died upon the cross, you are my Jesus who loves me..." -waterdeep

* Wednesday, July 23, 2003 *

big changes.
i haven't been here in a while to write, mostly because i haven't felt i had anything of substance to write about. sometimes i want to fill this place with fluffy entries simply to have something for people to read, but i don't think that is a good use of this site. i do have something to write about today though, so here i am.

today i gave notice to my boss that i will be leaving my job. there are a lot of reasons why i am quitting. the only reason i have been there this long is because of the money, and recently i've realized that just isn't enough anymore. i just don't get treated as well as i think i deserve to be. for example, management told me they were going to send me to a class to get more training in a certain program in order to provide me with more opportunities within the company, but then they decided it "wasn't worth the money" to train me. basically i am very unhappy at my job, so josh and i talked and decided that it would be worth it for the sake of my mental and emotional health to find a new place to work. i am hoping to work at a public library or some kind of public building like that. somewhere where i can feel i am doing something worthwhile! i'll still be at my current job for 2 and a half weeks, so hopefully i can find something else within that time. if not, josh and i are in an ideal situation living next to his parents so money is not a huge issue for us right now. josh is really supportive about my decision too. he's doing a wonderful job at being a husband!

i feel a lot happier having made this decision. i'm nervous about the future, as i always am when things are changing in my life, but i know God will take care of me and i feel confident that my decision was the right one.

"depth of mercy can there be mercy still reserved for me? can my God, your wrath forbear, me the chief of sinners, spare?" -caedmon's call

* Tuesday, July 08, 2003 *

honeymoon synopsis.
finally, i have some time to write about our adventures in london. i'm actually going to copy most of the summary out of the pages of my journal because i wrote a few entries while we were there.

june 16, 2003

we are in london! it is early on monday morning - i am awake and showered but josh is still sleeping. our trip so far has been difficult but wonderful. we had problems with our plane tickets, our airport transfer never showed up (we took a taxi instead), and our hotel bill will have to be paid in two separate installments. we arrived on friday which was a strange day for us because we were so exhausted from our overnight flight. after we checked in our luggage we went for a walk around the neighborhood. it was sunny and hot - not at all the way i had imagined london would be. when our room was ready we slept for a good eight hours! on saturday we got up early, had breakfast at the hotel, and took the underground to the london zoo! it was a great trip. we walked for hours, and on the way home stopped at oxford street (a huge shopping district) so i could buy socks. then yesterday, after having a late dinner at the hotel and staying up late on saturday night we slept all day. we took a bath, ordered room service, watched tv and read. josh said it was his favorite day so far. today we plan to visit st. paul's cathedral and the tower of london!

june 18, 2003

it's 3:13 am, but josh and i are both awake. we've been reading and watching "the telly" after taking a four - five hour nap this evening. it's clear that our bodies are very confused as to the actual time! i'm hoping our jet lag goes away once we get home. to catch up since my previous entry: we did go to st paul's which was beautiful and astonishing with only two disappointments associated to it. 1) no bird woman! ...tuppence a bag... 2) it is in the middle of being renovated and having some of its major paintings cleaned. some of the best parts were covered by tarps. still, it was magnificent. we got a few pictures of the outside. after st. paul's we went to the tower of london which is sort of a palace/fortress that holds some armories and the crown jewels. the crown jewels were brilliant but josh raised some unnerving points about displaying all that wealth when "people are starving in the sudan..." hmmm. the tower is also home to seven ravens, and apparently it is said that if the ravens leave the tower the kingdom will fall. after the tower we went to explore notting hill and had dinner at a really nice and inexpensive restaurant "all bar one". (i had a terrific salad with gorgonzola cheese and pears. mmmm!) yesterday, tuesday, was a big day of doing nothing, much like sunday. we did actually get up early and had breakfast downstairs. it is complimentary, after all! today, wednesday, we had breakfast and went down cromwell street to the natural history museum. the museum itself is a gorgeous architectural structure inside and out, but contained very little that interested us. we left fairly quickly. cafe mochas were had at a local cafe, "the patisserie", and then we went back to the hotel for a few hours to relax and read. my favorite part of today was this afternoon when we walked in kensington gardens and hyde park! it was so exciting! unfortunately i was wearing flip-flops and by the time we reached harrod's department store (our final destination) i had a large blister on my left foot that was causing me to limp painfully. harrod's was fantastic though. it's so big! four floors of restaurants, food pantries, cosmetics, even rooms full of teddy bears! we shipped my parents a tea chest complete with harrod's signature china tea set, tea, and biscuits. we'll go back on friday to buy the rest of the family gifts.

tomorrow (today, i suppose - our alarm will ring in three hours) we plan on visiting the british museum and buckingham palace. also, les mis is in the evening - yay! i can't wait. our honeymoon has been tiring, slightly stressful, but wonderful. only two days and two nights to go!

** there endeth the journal entries. we did go to the british museum and buckingham palace, but not until the day after. we also saw big ben, the houses of parliament, and westminster abbey that day. les mis was incredible, our favorite part of london. after that, we went home!

"sometimes i dream he'll come to me, and we will live the years together..." -fantine from les mis

* Tuesday, July 01, 2003 *

wedding pictures revealed!
our wedding pictures have been developed and are online for viewing! if you would like to see them, go to www.pictage.com and enter "reilly" in the event search. click on the "haggerty/reilly wedding". you will have to register with a name and email address if you want to look at the pictures. the event key is "kathleen". josh and i think they came out so well... enjoy!

"all day long i can hear people talking out loud, but when you hold me near you drown out the crowd..." -allison krause

* Monday, June 23, 2003 *

back in the states!
hello everyone! josh and i are back from our honeymoon in london and we had a lovely time. work prevents me from an extended entry at the moment, but keep checking back as i am planning to post a synopsis soon. yay!

(much thanks to peter wood for helping me fix my blog error!)

"a little fall of rain can hardly hurt me now..." -eponine from "les mis"

* Wednesday, June 11, 2003 *

june 7, 2003
i know i'm likely to get yelled at for writing a journal entry the night before my honeymoon while my husband is fast asleep, but i just can't fall asleep tonight. it's a combination of pre-flying nerves and not being used to sleeping in a different bed. at any rate, here i am and i wanted to give a summary of saturday for those of you who have been asking for it!

first of all, it poured all day long on saturday. all week the weather reports had hinted that some showers might come late at night, but we were not prepared for the steady and heavy rain we experienced from morning until night. luckily none of our wedding was outside so the only thing that was affected was where we took our formal photographs (we took pictures in the church sanctuary instead of outside on the common).

i got up when my alarm woke me at 9 am and took a really long shower. i packed my overnight bag and waited for my maid of honor (and best friend) ange to show up for our hair appointments! at noon we got our hair done (all up and curled with little curls framing our faces - very standard updos) and then went home to put our makeup on and get dressed. by 3 pm all the bridesmaids were dressed and at my house helping me get in the limo (imagine 2 girls holding my train and 3 girls and the limo driver holding umbrellas over me and my dress as i went from the front door to the car). we got to the church 40 minutes before the ceremony and i didn't feel nervous at all. it wasn't until it was my turn to walk down the aisle that i realized the organist hadn't shown up and the wedding music was being played over the speakers on a cd! our church organist apparently thought the wedding was at 5 pm instead of 4. at that point it didn't matter to me at all though, i was too happy and excited.

my favorite part of the whole day was when i began to walk down the aisle and saw my future husband's face light up. what an incredible feeling of joy! at that moment i just knew how wonderful the whole day was going to be. the ceremony went very smoothly with no problems, and neither of us cried! we grinned like idiots through the entire service. our good friend played guitar and sang "a page is turned" by bebo norman - he did a great job.

our reception was fun and the food was great, but we didn't get to eat much or dance at all because we had so many family members and friends to greet during the evening! by the time we left the reception and headed to boston for our wedding night we were completely wiped out and needed sleep desperately. we had a wonderful and romantic wedding night which was made even better when we ordered breakfast in bed and opened some of our wedding gifts.

the last few days we have spent cleaning our apartment (it is filled with boxes from me moving in and wedding gifts that are constantly arriving), doing laundry for london, packing, and doing last minute shopping for our trip. i am incredibly happy and can't wait to share more pictures with you and tell you how our honeymoon was! thank you so much for all of your kindess and happy messages you have sent me. i feel very very very special and very very very lucky.

now i feel more tired and able to go to sleep, i think. comments aren't working right now but hopefully they will be soon.

love, kathleen sarah reilly.

"a page is turned in this life, he's making her his wife, and there is no secret to the source of this much life..." -bebo norman

* Wednesday, June 04, 2003 *

3 days!
today is my last day of work before the wedding. i am getting nothing done, as might well be expected.

oooh... i just spilled coffee all over my atlas map book!

hm. my thoughts are disjointed. i'm getting married in 3 days!

* Thursday, May 29, 2003 *

and then the text in my God is warming up outside.
someone just showed me a website where you enter any url and it creates the page into a poem. it is highly amusing! check it out here. just add the url of your choice. here's the poem for my blog:

lily of the last
minute shopping
done. for an increasing amount
of being
the summer
after marriage . only have left a bad
things i always in
this excited feeling of my week
and more and
then it is not matter how we can
do my savior. all
ones i had
a paper i
do. my wedding dressand i love to
give an hour
reading children
i am tired
and unpacking, i have being a
chore, it is about them, up
material things And then the
text in my
God is
warming up outside.

haha, i love it! (9 days!)

"with my fighting so vain, with my vanity so strong, i'm rolling over..." -caedmon's call

* Wednesday, May 28, 2003 *

10 days!
josh and i applied for our marriage license today, so it is official. this wedding is happening. it was pretty cool to fill out "reilly" under the field "surname after marriage". only 10 more days of being a haggerty. very interesting. i'm sure i'll be slipping up and signing my name incorrectly for the next year or so. :)

tonight my mom, josh, and i are meeting the function coordinator at rossi's to finalize the reception plans. it will be a very fun meeting. we have between 200-250 guests coming so seating arrangements will be a challenge! things are falling into place though and i can't help but feel blessed and happy. the stress isn't so overwhelming anymore. answered prayers are the best!

"maybe all that i'd to do was done a long time ago..." -derek webb

* Tuesday, May 27, 2003 *

11 days!
one week from saturday, one week from saturday! i am far past the point where i can rationally discuss wedding plans and my life without beaming and clapping my hands. (it's cute at first... then it starts bugging people.) so aren't you lucky, all you readers, that you only have to read my thoughts instead of listen to my delighted squeals as i tell you my thoughts? i still have a lot to do but i have more joy about completing last minute tasks. everything is making me happy. thank you Jesus that i get to have such a blessing as marriage!

i can't form coherent thoughts right now. my mood varies between overjoyed-kathleen and completely-stressed-out-don't-talk-to-me-kathleen. if you're reading this, please pray that all goes as planned for the next few weeks and that we have nice weather on june 7th. i'll be back before then, but advance prayers won't hurt. thank you everyone!

"try as i may i can never explain what i hear when you don't say a thing..." -allison krause

* Monday, May 19, 2003 *

19 days!
to my delight and to your great annoyance I have decided that all posts from now until the wedding will be titled with the number of days i have left to go. as you can see, today's count is 19 more days until i get married! i can't believe how many things i have left until the last minute. i thought i was on top of everything - i was wrong! i have to pack up all my belongings and move them to josh's place, find my passport, make a packing list, wrap the bridesmaid and flower girl gifts, call and confirm all of our reservations, go to the store to pick up a billion things (hair dye, crest white strips, waterproof mascara, and the list goes on and on...), finish sending my thank you notes from my second shower, and there are a million more things. i'm going to hit the mall tonight to get all the last minute shopping done. afterwards i will clean and pack, clean and pack, clean and pack. after the wedding and honeymoon you know i will be cleaning and unpacking, cleaning and unpacking, cleaning and unpacking. i am thoroughly crazed, although not a fully-formed bridezilla. hehe.

i am loving that other people are excited for josh and i though. our families, obviously, are excited. but also our good friends and co-workers keep asking us how things are going and saying they can't wait for the "big day". it's very encouraging to know that our friends are thinking of us and praying for us right now. we can certainly use the prayers and kind thoughts! our main concern right now is having a marriage that is wholy centered on God. we're so easily distracted right now, especially by the thought of living together and certain marital benefits we will be enjoying that we have never had the privilege of enjoying before. ;) thanks to all for your prayers!

"and the God of second chance will pick them up and He'll let them dance, through a world that is not kind..." -bebo norman